You’ve known each other for years and, with every adventure, your relationship has solidified into something special. Now the day has finally come where he pops the question; “Will you be my best man?” Some tease that marriage is the death of a bachelor (queue Panic! At The Disco), so consider your toast as your groom’s eulogy. So how do you capture his life up to this point in a way that won’t concern his mom or bore your friends? But don’t worry — follow these four best man toast tips and you’ll do just fine!
Best Man Toast Tip #1
WRITE BOTH A LONG AND A SHORT VERSION
Trust me; you’ll want both for a best man toast. You can never guess what your audience is gonna be like until the day of, even if you personally know everyone; the emotions of the day affect everyone differently. Are folks dancing to the dinner music? They wanna get on the dance floor, and your toast is one of the last things standing in their way. Is your groom the first to get married in his family, and Mom is looking misty-eyed? Incorporate more childhood stories, and let them reminisce for a bit longer. Whatever your style, know and adjust to your crowd’s expectations, and you’ll have them ’em on your side!
Best Man Toast Tip #2
LEAD WITH A RELEVANT JOKE
Nothing puts folks at ease like humor. Up to this point, it’s been a happy but pretty stressful day, and everyone could probably stand to blow off some steam. Help wedding guests do that with a relevant joke in your toast, and you’ll be a hero. The key word here is relevant, though. Think of what makes your groom laugh and what will get you in the least amount of trouble with his bride. Now toasting your groom does not mean roasting your groom, but poking a little fun is almost expected. Just don’t rely on it. Also, try and avoid unexplained inside jokes that only two or three people will laugh at — to everyone else, it will be awkward.
Best Man Toast Tip #3
DESCRIBE THE GROOM WITH TWO SHORT STORIES
This isn’t an exact science; the idea is to help the guests get a hint of your groom’s full personality. It can be two or three quips or a full anecdote, but you should focus on what your groom is known for and how the stories in your toast can reflect that. While your focus is the groom, it’s also totally appropriate to give a shoutout to the bride. What was your perspective of your best friend’s new love interest when they first met? This can make for a great story as well.
Best Man Toast Tip #4
SEAL THE DEAL WITH EMOTIONAL HONESTY
Depending on your personality, opening up like this is either the easiest or hardest part of your toast. Welcome it either way. Your toast has helped folks relax and reminisce, and you’re now in a position to end strong. Consider exactly what your friendship with the groom has meant to you and say it. The honesty you give is what will solidify your toast as awesome and memorable in the minds of the bride, groom and their wedding guests.
BONUS Best Man Toast Tip
ENSURE A STRONG DELIVERY
As wedding DJs, we pay close attention to not just the content of the toasts, but also the delivery itself. Here are a few quick bonus tips to nail the delivery of your best man toast:
- Stand in a way that ensures that your back is neither to the person you’re toasting (the groom and bride) nor to the wedding guests.
- Hold that microphone nice and close! The truth is that while the best distance from your face is about 6 inches, most non-performers (meaning, you don’t do this on the daily/weekly) err on the side of holding it too far. Sometimes the mic also gradually fades away from your face and your voice gets softer… and softer. So we actually recommend that you err on the side of the mic being too close to your face, because we as DJs can tweak the volume, EQ, etc. as needed.
- Don’t cup the mic. It sounds terrible in every way. That is all.
- Don’t use the mic as a pointer. Microphones don’t work if you’re not talking into them, so when you point the mic to point out a friend in the crowd, your voice disappears.
- Drink a sip of water just prior to your toast. This will make sure your voice is clear and crisp, with fewer throat clears in the middle of the toast.
- Have fun with it. Using the tips above will ensure you crush your best man toast, so enjoy the moment and have fun!